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"Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny." Jack Handey
"With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke." Will Rogers
"What would men be without women? Scarce, sir ... mighty scarce." Mark Twain
"An optimist laughs to forget. A pessimist forgets to laugh."
"Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you are not a hypochondriac."
"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science." Albert Einstein
"I've learned ... that a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks." Andy Rooney
"Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing." Mother Teresa
"In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibration of beauty." Christopher Darlington Morley
"One cannot collect all the beautiful shells on the beach." Anne Spencer Morrow Lindbergh
